Last week saw: Tyrion being kidnapped by disgraced Ser Jorah Mormont, Cersei forming a new alliance, and a Stark returning to Winterfell. The action continues as the reasons for Cersei’s alignment with The Sparrows becomes a little clearer, Jaime and Bronn reach Dorne, and a massacre in Meereen.
The episode opens with Tyrion bound and gagged setting sail for Meereen with his captor and disgraced knight, Ser Jorah Mormont. As their journey progresses Tyrion is able to deduct his captor’s identity, motivation and highlight the pitfalls of his plan all in one fell swoop. Jorah isn’t too pleased with his captive’s evaluation and continues to play the stoic, unresponsive type for most of their journey.
As Tyrion and Jorah embark on their journey to one part of the world, Jaime and Bronn arrive in another. Travelling on a merchant ship undisguised, the two discuss Tyrion, their suicide mission-or rescue mission-and Bronn points out that Lannister gold may not be worth as much as it used to be anymore.
Upon arrival in the foreign climes of Dorne, the two Westeros natives are quick to enjoy the local cuisine (snake) and make quick work of a quartet of Dorne soldiers. The battle between the soldiers and Jaime and Bronn highlights the efficiency, determination and skill of both warriors, and assures that even if they’re both doomed they’ll give the forces of Dorne a hell of a fight.
In another part of the Dorne desert, the Sand Snakes make their highly anticipated debut and don’t disappoint. The Sand Snakes consist of: Obara (the grouchy, sullen diva in need of a Snickers), Nymeria (the quiet, calculated one) and Tyene (the eager, impetuous Mummy’s girl). Having captured and buried the merchant captain of Jaime and Bronn’s vessel up to his head (you just know he won’t live until the credits), they learn the Lannister is in Dorne.
In Winterfell things continue to get weirder and weirder, as Sansa and dear ‘uncle’ Littlefinger have a moment in the crypt. The two talk about a plan for payback on the Bolton’s, largely hinging on Stannis conquering Winterfell with his soon to be approaching army. Their conversation soon turns to other matters, as nothing says romance more than discussing a deceased aunt in a gloomy tomb. Seeing Littlefinger make a move on Sansa is a bit like seeing Uncle Fester snog Wednesday Adams, one step too far for even Hammer Horror.
At the Wall, Stannis continues to become more human and likeable with each episode; sharing a tender moment with his daughter. Behind his back a strange seduction as Melissandre tries to tempt Jon Snow with the ways of the cougar. He refuses her advances but the Red Woman wields a final emotional blow as she leaves him with the words of his former love: ‘You know nothing, Jon Snow.’
In King’s Landing, Cersei is having surprisingly good day which turns out to be horrific for almost everyone else in the capital. First Mace Tyrell is sent on a quest to the Iron Bank of Braavos accompanied by Lannister loyalist Meryn Trant, and then she informs the High Sparrow of Loras Tyrell’s sexual preference. That’s the Cersei way of getting out of marriage.
The Sparrows launch an attack on Littlefinger’s brothel, viciously manhandling patrons and smashing barrels of wine. This whole attack is juxtaposed with Lancel Lannister having The Sparrows’ symbol carved into his forehead, fully making him one of the new ‘cool’ religious mafia kids in the Game of Thrones playground.
Although his mother’s having a ball, this week isn’t too great for Tommen as he fails twice show any authority, to rescue the imprisoned Loras Tyrell from The Sparrows. At first he is unable to receive any help from mother dearest, and the spectacularly failing to negotiate with a mob of Sparrows. He also has a run-in with his not-so adoring subjects as they chant ‘abomination’ behind his back.
In Meereen, Dany’s troubles with the Sons of the Harpy reach a fever pitch as the Second Sons are attacked by the group and the Unsullied are ambushed. Barristan Selmy bravely joins the fray, saving Grey Worm’s life in the process. The episode ends with the Sons of the Harpy felled but the bodies of two of Dany’s most trusted confidantes amongst them.
