Last week Bronn and Jaime’s rescue mission didn’t go according to plan, Olenna Tyrell returned to King’s Landing, and Sansa discovered the truth about Ramsay.
The episode begins with snow falling at Castle Black as newly elected Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch John Snow prepares to leave to recruit the remaining ‘Free Folk’ for the war to come with the White Walkers. Sam presents his friend with a satchel of Dragon glass, and Alliser Thorne says goodbye in a way only he can, disapprovingly.
Sam also says farewell to Maester Aemon, as he suffers the most surprising cause of death in Westeros: natural causes. As he finishes his eulogy it becomes clear that Sam can count his remaining friends at the Wall on less than one hand.
Later, the man of the Night’s Watch tries to lice up to his ‘Sam the Slayer’ nickname as two of his ‘brothers’ try to take out their sexual frustration on Gilly. He fails to hold his sword properly and comes across more Padawan than Jedi Knight. The timely arrival is the only reason both he and Gilly are saved.
In the snow, Stannis’ are struggling to maintain their momentum to Winterfell as horses are dying and sellswords are deserting. Ser Davis advises him to retreat to the Wall, but not wanting to be known as ‘the king who ran’ he refuses to take it. Melissandre is also disappointed that the king won’t sacrifice his daughter for the war. She really should have given him the leeches he wanted.
In Winterfell, Sansa is a Rapunzel without the hope of being rescued by a Prince Charming. She only has her remaining friends in the North, who she asks ‘Reek’ to signal for her. Bad choice. As ‘Reek’ makes his way up winding stairs, it almost seems probable that he’s going to help Sansa. Almost.
Until Ramsay is revealed behind the door he opens. The sadistic Bolton can’t help but gloat to his new wife, as they walk the battlements Sansa bites back against her tormentor. That is until she sees the flayed corpse of her elderly female ally.
In Dorne, it becomes even more clear to Jaime that his mission was a complete waste of time as Myrcella points out that she has lived in Dorne for years and does not want to return to Westeros. At least he has a nice cell. Bronn serenades the Sand Snakes from his prison, and quickly learns that he has been poisoned, surviving only by complimenting Tyene.
Far away, Jorah and Tyrion are sold to a new master, and make their way to the fighting pits. Tyrion has to ensure he is sold alongside Jorah by beating the man who holds his chains to prove he has more than just a savage tongue.
At the pit, Dany arrives alongside her new husband-to-be looking a little more than peeved. That fighters fight to the death before her, and she’s ready to leave until See Jorah defeats the other combatants his face covered by a helm. As he reveals his identity, Dany is even more displeased until her ‘gift’; Tyrion is presented to her. Thus two of the show’s biggest icons have finally met.
In King’s Landing, Olenna Tyrell makes her rounds of promises and threats, first to the High Sparrow (who gives another 1% vs the 99% speech); and then to partner in crime Littlefinger, whom she doesn’t bother making any promises to. Though if Little finger is to believed Olyvar’s death could be enough to halt the persecution of Lady Olenna’s grandchildren.
Whilst Olenna goes about theses matters, Cersei takes the time to reassure Tommen that she will do all she can to ensure the release of his queen. She’s lying, only wishing to visit Margaery in the Black Cells to gloat over her rival.
Though Cersei’s discussion with the High Sparrow doesn’t go according to plan, as they discuss the sins of the Tyrell family, her own are highlighted. She has nowhere to hide, as her cousin Lancel Lannister reveals himself from the shadows. Cersei tries to make her escape, only to be stopped and taken to the cells by septerns. Her cries of ‘I am the Queen’ (a title she hasn’t truly held since Joffery became king) go unlistened to. Her reign seemingly over.
